J I am the matchstick and you are the brick Just a little contact and there is a spark Soon i find myself aflame Burning to life for my art You didn't mean to ignite me, but you did Brought back all the things from when i was just a girl Got me on track to where i belong Once i was weak but now, i am powerhouse strong now i am fully alive and feeling free All because of a little song you sang for me I am filled with gratitude and love For all the things you opened up in me Suddenly i know what its like to feel free Loving life and living in peace if i had the chance to say one thing to you it would be a sincere and hardy thank you Sweet Sulfur I can feel your pain in your words It tastes like Sulfur on my tongue But, with a sweetness as it passes my lips Because it comes from your heart Where anything that passes through it, becomes sweeter I feel you I see you Nakedness but fully clothed Your heart is like mine You have been to dark places, like me The scars we bare Make us who we are Kindred's In two separate worlds You touch me in a way i have never known before I am grateful and filled with love for that You helped to make me a better me You showed me who i was meant to be You were a piece of me, i did know was missing You fixed what i did not know was broken I don't mind the taste of Sulfur sweetened by you I don't mind it because it is a part of you Now, i just wish you could see me That i could give something back to you Would you taste my pain? Would it make you weak? Would you run away Fail to find the words to speak? Would you see in me Beauty and light? Would you hold my hand when i cried in the night? Would you be someone that i have looked for so long A dear and kind friend, who helps me struggle on? Would my pain taste as sweet? or would it be bitter and hard to swallow? Would you see inside me and see all my pretty things Deep down, swimming round in technicolor seas Would you look Would you see, what i see in you? that i know lives in me Would Would I look you in the eyes If we met on the street After all the things We've done While we were dancing in my dreams Would i embrace you Like a long lost friend Would i stutter and stare at my feet Would i tell you all my secrets Giving you my trust Would i want to kiss you Feeling loves first rush Would i let you hold my gaze without looking away Would i open myself to you Let you taste a little of my pain Would you want to hold me and take that pain away Or would you reject me coldly Just turn and walk away I really want to know you Find out if your heart is like mine Would you want to be my friend If we had a meeting of the minds Would you take my hand dance with me and laugh Sing to me a new song Show me a bit of your life A world i've never seen Would I even have the guts to speak to you If i saw you on the street. The wanting I see you But you can't see me I want to know you But you will never know me i run through the scenarios the things i want to tell you the things about myself i want to share with you and you alone But, i you will never hear my sweet words They will never dance in your ears and then comes the pain hurt of a never will be The wanting the needing for you No one ever tells you how to do this How to desire for what you will not have How to not bleed for it Its my heart that lies to me and lies they kill Fantasy bleeds into reality for me sometimes because of the respite that comes with thinking of you Something so complicated I don't know you but i feel like i can feel your soul from across the miles across the world My mind is contaminated by thoughts of you like a disease i can not shake But its a sweet disease so i don't try to make it leave You feel like home to me Inside my head You feel like you would understand It feels like sickness thinking of you each day the cure.... the cure.... I am not ready to take now Because in you i find comfort In you i find a kindred I live in your imagined inspirit of me Imagining your eyes feels like forever. feels like you can ease my pain, as you taste it on your lips as it hangs in the air scents the room like a perfume for I am enraptured in your grace the heart i feel beating beside my own The illusion just leaves me dwelling in the wanting. I am the queen in a fools paradise to make good my circumvention from this pain You are comfort and pain You soothe the savage and cause me to ache I try not to dream too big It hurts too much to do so But, any dreaming... it just leaves me dwelling in the land of the wanting Indelible Your precious words play around in my head I agonize over never knowing you But i can't deny you entrance into my mind I struggle But your euphonic voice is your acquiesce inside I suffer I grieve Your absence Though it never was In countenance I live You have been given sanctuary in my heart but you will never choose to dwell I try to cut you out try to burn you down but you return you always return No blood, no fire can abate I don't want it i cant throw it away i try to shake you but you follow me every second i am awake Like a ghost like a demon You have become indelible to my soul The in between I can feel What lies behind your eyes disgust, dismay you see me as ambiguous forgotten I ama woman soft and sweet tender and wise I have two arms I have two lips I have a heart to give I have a soul yet you look at me with displeasure You look at me and you don't see I am a woman you just see something lying in the in between Haunted by you We have never met But, you haunt me You come to me hanging on like a specter hovering here with me Telling me secrets and kind words I practice conversations I imagine things we'd do Its like you are here with me now Like its real You spend my day with me you go to bed with me at night you are there in the morning I smile when i feel you here with me Have I gone mad? Because it feels real I don't invite you in you just come on your own I spend my days haunted by the living I spend my days haunted by you Broken Halo I am no angel There are no wings on my back Tho' i be a saint I wear my flaws on my sleeve My life is complicated In its simplicity It doesn't take much to make me happy A little love, a little faith an little peace I am a simple girl With complicated issues My baggage weighs a ton and if you are going to know me, You will have to help carry Help carry me along NO, i am no angel of that i am sure Get to know me and you will be sure too My thoughts run too deep I feel, oh, do i feel I feel so much you might run away But, stick around a while, peel back the layers Like an onion It smells bad But, you like it anyway I am complicated Yes, its true. My halo is broken Burn it Down a kiss, a kiss, all my fortune for a kiss. one touch, one touch one touch without wicked lust I have set my pain and fear a fire. Burn, burn. Burn them down. a kiss a kiss my kingdom for a kiss. I look at you and i see, i see another part that belongs to me one hand to hold. Burn it down all that's wrong i am left standing strong Acid Lies So he just stood there With nothing but dead in his eyes The body still breathing The heart still beating But nothing about him was alive. His words once were sweet but they were lies that burn me like acid running down dissolving flesh You want to cry out but the sound does not come. So you stand there, being vanquished by acid lies. Scenarios I lie in bed Sleep that never comes I cant get you out of my mind Running thru scenarios Running thru scenes Of perfection of things I'd like to do and see I only think of you like this Because i have nothing real Its a bit of cold comfort Its just a mind trick that gets me by As i am wasting time Waiting for the real to begin Fallen I wont give in to it I wont succumb No matter where you lead me I am not really coming along My strength may be failing But my will is fine Body weak Spirit willing You think i have fallen behind But, i am in a different place than you A different kind of life The burn, the hunger Is not stronger than me Failure is no option This is not a game People stuff these things down into their holes trying to fill a void only coming up empty bloated and deformed I have fallen before But was caught before the big boom I never hit bottom Not like you If you'd only let me I fall into your eyes Swimming in your soul I think I could love you If you'd let me I could be the girl That changes your world If you's only let me I could take you places You've never been before I could show you what love can be like If you'd only let me I look at you and Can only think of a kiss I like the colors of your soul Your gentle spirit as it rolls I think your heart is like mine I think in some way we are the same You inspire me I could inspire you If you'd only let me Roll tears roll Down my saddened face For a love lost i never had One that can not be replaced. Free to be I am alone But not lonely I see red I burn I laugh I love and i cry But, I am not like you I don't suppress The things God gave me I don't live to impress I am not tense with restraint I am free Free to be Who God made me And I Live I don't want you to see The part of me i hide The broken, and messed up side The dark and morose me The girl who just cant forget The pain, the suffering, the rejection The girl who sits in a corner alone in the dark The girl with scars on her arms Put there by her own hands When she was trying to make sense of her madness She is not all daisies and rainbows She is not like her friends She is not like anyone really She is the girl living just one step behind and one notch below She does not understand them fully She doesn't know how to act or react Like a foreign substance In an unstable environment I never want you to see her So i stuff her down cover her in blankets gag her, so no one hears her screaming tie her hands I put a smile on my face I dress in pretty colors and i go on with life like i am just like you and i live. Ripe I can taste your pain I can feel it to my core I look into your eyes I am hungry Hungry for something more Something you cant give me Something i cant have even if you did Do you taste my pain? Do you see me? With one kiss, you could know all With one kiss I would probably fall from grace from my chosen path I am weak I am ripe For being picked from the vine Justified I don't care what people say about me Them and their small minds I know where i stand I know who i am I don't have to answer to them Am i accountable? Yes i am Am i a sinner Yes I am I am real, i am flawed, i am inherently screwed up Don't look to me for an example You will only be disappointed I am justified by faith A Faith i hold dear But, i am still human. That's why i need salvation I am here on earth to live a life i have been given Whether by divine hands or my mothers mistake That's all i can do. That's all i can be. Contradiction I am perfection in imperfection I am criminal within the law I am confidence in insecurity I am bravery in fear I am flawed I am screwed up, bad I am beauty in ugliness I am strength in submission I am Spiritual in the physical I am truth in lies I am sleep when awake I am Tough in my softness I am rough when i am smooth I stand when i fall I am passion within loathing I am love within hatred I am dark and I am light I am vanilla within chocolate I am woman I am you Dreaming of you I loved you once Thought you could be mine But you didn't want me Left me behind Years later now We're still friends Sometimes i remember and so it begins I had a dream last night I was kissing you It felt like heaven Like i it had finally come The thing I had wanted That once nearly made me come undone but I felt guilty Afraid she'd know What I had done I will never kiss you I Don't even want to now Except when I am dreaming Dreaming of you Abomination A life lived without touch is no life to live at all to long for the affections of one But receiving none retreats into her mind where touch comes and kisses burn and love is felt even though its imagined. It brings release from alone A life without touch makes her feel like an abomination her humanity drifted away somewhere in the lost years she feels unworthy unwanted unloved unneeded to a world that is filled with bright shining lies walking around in human bodies her realness frightens her pain drives touch away A life lived without touch is no life to live at all Alone I am woman I am a lover an artist a poet a writer a passion beyond your comprehension I can bear fruit deep in my belly I can hide i can play I need I want But i do not get the things that make me human Make me able to breath to feel to burn to live I am woman alone Ignite Those eyes Those lips I look at you and all i can think of is a kiss You ignite in me something new A passion a need a desire Something that has lay dormant for all my years Your peace Your gentle heart A contradiction to those who see you with old eyes You speak words that penetrate my heart and mind But, looking at you, i know, you will never be mine. This knowledge breaks me This knowledge burns I pity you You laugh right in my face Oh so sure you've put me in my place But what you don't know What you don't see is the one whose laughing, is me. I walked away from those days with you Where you could break me, over take me I was a fool My life is new now it has nothing to do with you I survived, all the pain you put me through You tossed me around broke me down ripped me apart. Its an understatement to use the term "broken heart" I said goodbye to you You are miserable now while i am soaring on clouds i pity you. One Trick Pony I cant see you anymore. My visions blurred by tears and more I thought we were forever But soon i realized forever is a lie. You spoke kind words what i wanted to hear I'm beautiful baby have no fear I'll take good care of you Just love me baby I'll stay true You brought me passion Burned up the bed Your every action, was for my benefit What i did not know what i could not see All your love, was just an act you played for me Your words were lies Your body too Lying whispers Hurtful shouts Pushed down and threatened You broke me down Until i thought that you'd be the only one To ever want me Because i was broken down You are a one trick pony You have no depth How could you know me When you don't even know yourself? Next page Home last updated: 12/23/2006